This year for Christmas, I got a website. Not  just any website, but this website. You know www.allgirlsareobese.com, well, I am now the proud owner of that website. Thank you Peter C. Hayward, who, indecently, owns www.thechainsawblokes.com. We are the website owners. Of those to websites, that is.

The website is named All Girls Are Obese.com because by todays standards, everyone is fat or deathly thin. There is no in between. So you're either fat or dead. Which is not a nice set of options. As well as that, no one looks any good, unless you're in a magazine, but even that's not natural. It's airbrushed.

I have decided to attempt to work out the best way to look good. So far I've decided that that taller you are, the thinner you look. So, logically, we should all start wearing stilts.

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Back to Christmas. For Christmas, I got many incredibly wonderful gifts. Thank you to everyone who gave me a present, you made my day present filled.

I got:
          This brilliant website (Yay for Peter!)
          An amazing oragami calander. It's a rip out calander and each day you learn to make something out of             the previous days page. (Thanks Mum, it's simply fantastic)
          Two beautiful skirt, one lime green, one purple, blue, black and white. (I love them Mum)
          Some lovely embroidery cotton. (I know they were from you, William)
          A very pretty purple tray. (Thankee parento's, namely mum)
          A gorgeous silver charm bracelet. (I adore this, Mum)
          A lunchbox, purple, very useful. (Finally, my lunch has a place it is not ashamed to call home.)
          A very funny and lovely Vicar of Dibley, season three. (Santa, you always have a way of knowing. I'm             sure I can find it in my heart to forgive you for mixing up the wrapping papers colours.)
          Two very exact metres of licorice. (The lunchbox bought me a present. I was impressed)          
          A lime green covered notebook. (My skirt can now team with the theme.)
          An assortment of lollies. (Santa is trying to fatten me up, I just know it.)
          A blue boltbabe pencil case. (I suspect there are a few dishevelled babies in there.)
          The very first of the nicely covered Obernewtyn chronicles. Obernewtyn was it's name. (Peter. When             will you learn.)
         

There was probably some other stuff, but I am far to busy to remeber more than that. Busy, busy, busy.

Our rellies came over, which was good.

It is far to hot to be typing, so bye.

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When I was younger, my friend said you lost weight when you sweated, so she'd put hot, wet washers on my forhead, then weigh me. The scales are amazingly still alive today. They live in the secluded village af my bathroom floor, with their niece, the sink, next to them and their grandkids the two wall hanging bins above them. They eagerly await the day when they get to meet them. Please, kids, give them a call.

 

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